What Does "Living Life on Life’s Terms" Mean?

When we get sober it can be hard to live in acceptance at first. Things can come up that can be difficult to walk through. It is imperative that we learn how to live life on life’s terms. What this means is that we turn our will over to a higher power and learn how to take things as they come. If we are willing to accept things as being exactly how they are supposed to be in each moment we will be able to gain clarity and approach each situation with peace and dignity. Prior to receiving alcohol addiction help for our alcohol addiction, going through the addiction recovery process, and getting sober, most of us were used to trying to control every aspect of our lives. Most of us had become so isolated and spiritually bankrupt that there was no one else to turn to let alone a set of spiritual tools that we could use to help cope with each situation. When we get sober we learn that in order to have any real sense of power or control over a situation we must surrender, ask for guidance, and take action. As it says in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous “Faith without works is dead”. Therefore while it is important that we have faith and surrender, it is also equally as important that we take action. In recovery we get to find the balance between surrendering and taking action while living in acceptance.

Dealing With Stress in Sobriety

Just because we get alcohol addiction help and get sober does not mean that everything is perfect. It just means that we finally have tools to deal with things as they come up. In sobriety there are a number of things that can come up, from your car not starting when you’re running 20 minutes late, to a job interview, to your bank account being over drafted. Life can throw you curve balls. There will be times when you’ll want to rip your hair out or dwell on “what ifs”. Without the alcohol to calm the storm, what now? How do you deal with life’s ways of surprising you?

 

Relaxing During Stressful Times

Sometimes just breathing, sitting down, putting pen to paper and venting will relieve some of that tension. Get yourself to a meeting, and share about what’s going on. There will be someone there who is going through what you are, or has gone through it and can give you a different perspective.

Don’t be So Tough on Yourself

Stress is our reaction to being overwhelmed.  Pick something that makes you happy that you may or may not have done in a while and do it!  As alcoholics our minds are constantly racing. We can be our toughest critic. When we go through a 12 step recovery program we are given everything we need to be able to stay calm, cool, and collected in every situation. Through the 12 steps of recovery we can begin to deal with stressful situations while maintaining a sense of peace, and serenity.

Building Self-Esteem in Recovery

We gain self-esteem by doing admirable acts. When we get sober most of us are used to having little to no self esteem left. We had been defeated by the years of destruction and pain that our drinking and drug addiction had caused us and others. Most of could not imagine getting to the place where we were able to love ourselves again. Most of us were stuck in a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body and did not know how to get out until we started the addiction recovery process, got alcohol addiction help, and got sober. 

New Start in Recovery

Over time we begin to right our wrongs and clean up the wreckage of our past. We begin to get honest with ourselves and others, and we become happy and usefully whole once again. We can begin to hold our heads up and look people in the eyes. We can begin to carry ourselves with dignity and grace. Others begin to see the change in us and we become the type of people that others can depend on. If we are willing to do the work on ourselves, trust in God, clean house, and work with others, we will be able to feel good about ourselves and our actions. We are all finite fallible human beings. There will be times when we fall short. That is to be expected. All we can do is move forward and continue trying to do the best we can do.

Walking Through Fear With Faith In Recovery

When we were in the midst of our alcohol addiction most of us were used to living in fear. When we get sober does not mean this changes immediately. We fear the unknown, something that has happened, going to happen, or losing people, places, or things. Sometimes this is just par for the course on our journey through recovery. However, there are times that things beyond our control come into play and our deepest fears come to light. It’s at this point that we must turn to our higher power to pull us through. Things don’t always turn out the way we hope but all we can do is pray and know that there is a plan for us all. We may not know how things will work out but if we have faith in a power greater than ourselves then we will be able to walk through any fear that may come up for us.

 

Make the Choice

 Many of us choose to make the supreme sacrifice and go back to drinking rather than continue the fight. Through doing the 12 steps of recovery and going to an addiction recovery program we are given the tools we need to cope with situations that we couldn’t handle before. No matter how big or small the problem may be we never have to drink over it and we never have to go through anything alone ever again if we don’t want to. There are many people that are in recovery that will be happy to help if we let them. If we take everything a day at a time or even a moment at a time, then we can make it through anything.

Recovering From a Relapse and Doing Things Differently This Time

Unfortunately as alcoholics and addicts, relapse is a part of many of our stories. While it is not always the case many of us have a hard time getting sober the first time around and can get caught up once again in our drug addiction. Relapse does not have to be a part of your story; but if it is it doesn’t mean that you are incapable of recovering.

Your Feelings are Normal

It is normal to feel beaten down, scared, and even more defeated after relapsing then you might have

prior to originally getting sober. Many of us feel like we have failed and have let ourselves and others down. Our ego usually takes a beating when we relapse. All we can do is be grateful for what we learned from the relapse and try to do things differently this time around.

Learn from Your Relapse

If we are able to look back at our experience and see where we fell short we can do things differently this time around. Perhaps we need to go through alcohol inpatient treatment, attend 12 step meetings, go to therapy, or seek extra alcohol addiction help. Whatever the case may be we all have the chance to recover if we keep trying, and don’t drink or use no matter what. If we are willing to put our sobriety first then we can begin to build a strong foundation for ourselves and our recovery.