The Problem With Thinking You’re Different When It Comes To Addiction

For us alcoholics, thinking that we are terminally unique is second nature to us. Most of us get sober, go to a recovery program, and look for the differences rather than the similarities. Nobody likes to believe that they have an alcohol or drug abuse problem, therefore it is natural to think that maybe we are different, maybe we aren’t alcoholics or addicts, and do not need sobriety and recovery. Maybe we were just having a hard time or we were just going through a time of hard partying.

 

Denial In Addiction Doesn’t Change The Fact That We Are Indeed - Addicts

When we listen to people’s stories and think to ourselves, “well that didn’t happen to me”, what we are doing is feeding that part of us that is trying to deny that we have a problem. The fact is that it does not matter how much we drank or used and what happened to us. All that matters is the consequences, the fact that we did not like and/or could not control our using and that our using affected  our loved ones.

Letting Go, Admitting You’re An Addict And Recovering

You must be willing to say that you are an addict..that you have no real power over your addiction. If you’re willing to listen for the similarities rather than the differences then it might help put things into perspective. Maybe you didn’t hit as deep of a bottom then some or most but if you listen carefully, surely you can identify with the feelings of being bankrupt spiritually, helpless, and shut off from the world. While we might not have come to the place of needing to get sober the same way as another addict, the fact is that we are all in this together and for the same reasons. You can have hope in recovery!

Is Marijuana Really Harmful?

There are some people out there including people that are thinking about or trying to get sober that do not consider weed to be harmful, problematic or even something that could create a chemical dependency. Some of these people pose arguments such as: “it’s a plant”, “nothing bad happens when people smoke”, “you can’t get addicted or die from pot”, and/or “I have a problem with other substances but not with weed”. Then there are the “what ifs”: “what if I get sick and need it?”, “what if my insomnia never goes away?”, “what if I can’t get rid of my anxiety without it?” etc

Effects Of Drugs

Most of us in recovery find that any mind altering substances, regardless of where it comes from or how it affects us cognitively is most likely problematic, harmful, and potentially fatal for us. We suffer from a disease that not only affects us physically but also spiritually and mentally as well.

A drink or drug for us in any form is potentially devastating to us on many levels. While those questions may come up for all of us at time or another, there are many other ways to handle situations that come up without running the risk of jeopardizing our lives and sanity and without including marijuana.

Weed Is Not Worth It

While there have been benefits for us as people that deal with drug and alcohol addiction, the reality of what weed or any other substance does to us far out way the benefits. Regardless of what hand life deals to us we can get through anything sober as a result of not giving up and sticking to our 12 steps of recovery.

What Are Your Trust Issues In Sobriety?

When most of us were getting sober we weren’t the most trusting or trustworthy bunch. It can be hard to trust others or ourselves when we had fallen so far down the scale. When we get sober most of us are used to having to take care of ourselves which doesn’t leave much room for us to learn to trust others or let a higher power into our lives.

Why It’s Hard for A Recovering Alcoholic To Trust

Learning how to trust others can be hard especially for the alcoholic who has a preconceived idea that people are untrustworthy usually as a direct result of our actions while we were out using and struggling with our chemical dependency issues. This lack of ability to trust ourselves and others usually stems from years of dishonest behavior and motives on our part. It is hard to believe that others are to be trusted when not only is our behavior questionable but most of us feel unsafe with ourselves both physically and emotionally as well. 

How A Recovering Addict Can Start To Trust

The only way to restore our faith in ourselves and others is to begin to change the things that need to be changed within ourselves by letting go and attending a 12 step recovery program and cleaning our side of the street up. When we begin to live with integrity, and respect as well as develop our own code of morals then not only will it be easier to trust in others but it will also be easier to handle situations when we are disappointed and feel that we or our fellows are falling short of our ideals. When we go through the 12 steps of recovery we can begin to be free without placing indignant demands upon others.

Are You Giving 100% In Your Sobriety?

When we are newly sober, get into a 12 step recovery program, and go through the addiction recovery process, most of us are enthusiastic and excited about our life. We have a willingness to go to any lengths to stay sober and continue our newfound resolve. Most of us come out of our battle with chemical dependency declaring that we will never drink again no matter what! This is great however, the longer we stay sober it is common that while we maintain the same level of willingness most of us lose that level of desperation that we once had.

 

Questions To Ask Yourself In Sobriety

It is imperative that we check in with ourselves and ask if we are giving 100%, and if not, then how much are we putting into our sobriety? Are we skipping meetings when we know we need one? Are we not calling our sponsor and checking in?  How can we go back to giving 100%? What needs to change so that we have the best chance at staying sober? 

Are we being dishonest and keeping secrets? If so how can we change these things in order to improve our sobriety?

If we really desire to keep our sobriety and our willing to go to any lengths to do that then we must stay diligent and do whatever it takes to stay on the path. If we find that we are struggling, there are many ways we can get out of our funk -  from talking to people, to praying and meditating - asking for clarity on how to handle situations and of course seeking God’s will for us.

Being Responsible in Recovery

We have spent much of our lives running.  Now that we received alcohol addiction help, and started the addiction recovery process it is time we stopped running and started showing up. As we grow older the responsibilities also grow. As sober members of society we have a new set of morals. One, being that we honor the commitments we make to ourselves. Showing up and suiting up not only shows ourselves that we can be accountable but shows others that we are dependable.

 

Choosing Sobriety

We chose to get sober to live our lives free from the bondage of our alcohol addiction. If we are too busy avoiding our responsibilities what kind of life are we leading? As alcoholics we need tasks. We need to do things that make us feel accomplished. Showing up for those tasks might seem difficult but afterwards it feels great. Being responsible does not always have to do with the physical act of showing up but also taking responsibility in our interactions with others. With every situation comes positive and negative reactions.

 

Taking Responsibility

We must take responsibility and keep the side of our street clean. We must check our motives and our actions without taking other people’s inventory. When we mess up we must humble ourselves, see where we might have been wrong, and take responsibility for it. It is hard to humble ourselves when we are in the wrong because of our egos but when we take responsibility for our actions it is one of the most empowering things we can do for ourselves. Being responsible in all of our affairs will not only help us grow but it will also help us learn how to have respect for ourselves and those around us.

Life After Cloud Nine

Often times what ends up happening when we receive alcohol addiction help, and get sober is everything seems to get better, there are moments of pure bliss, and everything seems great. It’s almost like were high on life. This is often referred to as a pink cloud. It’s that time in sobriety when the emotional fog from years of battling with our alcohol addiction has lifted and everything seems amazing. These times come and go throughout our sobriety.

Staying Realistic and Being Prepared in Sobriety

While it is a nice place to be in it is also important that we prepare for the times that don’t seem so perfect. The longer we stay sober the more those feelings of elation are replaced with more consistent feelings of joy, peace, and happiness. It may seem disappointing when those elevated moods drop and that pink cloud dissipates but the fact is that when that happens it is a perfect opportunity to begin really working on ourselves. It is through doing the work, and going through the addiction recovery process that we can begin to heal from our past as well as build a foundation on which we can have long term sobriety. Its one thing to stay sober through the good times but it’s another to do the work and stay sober through the more difficult times. The more we are in tune with our reality the better the chances are that we will stay sober. If we build a life we love and work towards being the type of person we want to be there will be no need for pink clouds because being present in the moment and truly will be much more gratifying.

Worrying About the Future in Sobriety

What will the weather look like in 5 years? What about the exact moment you will find your dream job? What happens if you end up not getting that job and all of a sudden you find yourself in a financial mishap? Future tripping is a tendency that the alcoholic has mastered. One thought turns into a whole script for our future that we have written in our heads that causes us to panic and live in fear. Combine that with high anxiety and a fear of failure and you have a recipe for disaster. The future is not something we can predict as much as we think we can. Through going to a 12 step recovery program we are given tools to help us stay present. Prayer and meditation are two big tools we learn through the 12 steps of recovery that can help keep us grounded. Sometimes just standing still, and asking yourself “am I present or am I living in the future?” can help us stay present in the moment.

 

Redirecting Focus

If you find that you are living in the future it can beneficial to redirect your focus to the present moment. If you are consciously reminding yourself what you are doing in the moment, you’re not worrying about the future. Another way to stay present is doing relaxing and meditating exercises like yoga. Movement and focusing on your breathing is not only a good way to exercise, but it’s also a way to get some serenity and stay grounded. The future hasn’t happened yet, and we can only control our present actions. Live in the moment, because in the future when we look back on our lives all we will have are the memories we are creating today.

What Does "Living Life on Life’s Terms" Mean?

When we get sober it can be hard to live in acceptance at first. Things can come up that can be difficult to walk through. It is imperative that we learn how to live life on life’s terms. What this means is that we turn our will over to a higher power and learn how to take things as they come. If we are willing to accept things as being exactly how they are supposed to be in each moment we will be able to gain clarity and approach each situation with peace and dignity. Prior to receiving alcohol addiction help for our alcohol addiction, going through the addiction recovery process, and getting sober, most of us were used to trying to control every aspect of our lives. Most of us had become so isolated and spiritually bankrupt that there was no one else to turn to let alone a set of spiritual tools that we could use to help cope with each situation. When we get sober we learn that in order to have any real sense of power or control over a situation we must surrender, ask for guidance, and take action. As it says in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous “Faith without works is dead”. Therefore while it is important that we have faith and surrender, it is also equally as important that we take action. In recovery we get to find the balance between surrendering and taking action while living in acceptance.